WSRFC Team Meeting

6 May 2003

Yes, it was another great triumph for democracy at the Western Suburbs Rugby Football Club, Inc. team meeting held last night.

Present (in no especial order) were: Brigham, Joe Cardinale, Worf, Begovich, Kermit, McClatchey, O.D., Kurt, El Jefe, Jimmy Dum-Dum, Schnauzer, Kevin "Fan Head" Bucher, Lumberjack, Bryan "Jackass" Laird, Jeff "Nobody gives me nicknames" Gardner, Jay Period, Verbal, Freddy, Matt Clark, Ringknocker, Pete "The Human GPS" Murray, Weenie Boy, Cruz, Crazy Eddie, Dan Leckburg, Cookie, Ian, Princess, James Joseph, Gallagher, Bushy, Griffenhagen, Duker and Caesar - 34 in all. The venue was the Fairfax Reds Room in the upstairs of the Firehouse Grill in downtown Fairfax.

That place ought to invest in an air conditioner - it sure gets hot up there. But then, all the hot air we produced couldn't have helped. Did nobody think of cracking a window?

"Call to order" (such as it was) was at 7:20. The following items were discussed with vigor and alcohol:

- We started off with a report of the coaching survey by Coach Schnauzer. He reported that response was good and that almost to a man the Tight Five told the coaching staff that they wanted more positional coaching. I certainly do. Some of those surgeon's rubber gloves would be a considerate gesture from the club as well. Do you guys have any idea what it's like grasping down into a prop's waistband?

- Lumberjack brought up the fact that MARFU is considering a competition for Division II b-sides. (In Western Suburbs this is the side we call the Blues. Or maybe the Reds. I'm not entirely sure.) This provoked extended comment, mostly in terms of the continued existence of the Fairfax Reds. It looked like everyone agreed that the little experiment known as the Fairfax Reds in Division III competition has been a success, and that there was strong assent to having it continue. How this plays into MARFU's plans - assuming these plans actually come about - is open to question. At one point, Kermit boldly declared himself for committing a procreative act upon MARFU.

Some notes from Coach Reading of Frederick RFC about this.

- We then turned to the topic of Summer Sevens. Kevin Corry read a long list of announced tournaments, which he promised to send me so that I could relay them to you. They are now posted. There will be one and only one side entered for tournaments. And practice will be a "true" Sevens practice led by Chris Harvey for the first three weeks and probably taken over by Cookie.

- Fields. What a pain. Oy, you have no idea. But Kevin mentioned that we have a verbal assurance from Fairfax County Parks and Recreation (a muddled, bureaucratic organization if ever there was one) that we can start back at Dunn Loring on 15 July. El Jefe announced, "Gentlemen, this means we're going back home," and everyone wiped tears from their eyes. Home. Was there ever a word in the English language so evocative? Dunn Loring: peeing in the bushes, that wonderful spread of dirt in front of the goals, in the middle of the pitch and, well, just about everywhere else. Harpold Hill. P.J. Skidoo's. Home. Pack up the mules, boys, we're goin' back home! Kevin also mentioned a possibility of donated acreage (a game pitch) in Fauquier County that, frankly, sounds too good to be true. But miracles can happen! (Rossi is getting married, there's proof of that. "Nothing new to report except my marrying, which, to me, is a source of wonder." - Abe Lincoln)

- Bryan Laird has CIPP cards and will hand these out at practices.

- Jesse Verbal told us how much money we have, but it isn't a whole lot. I forgot. $24.76, I think. Okay, I lie. Bryan Laird's notes reveal that we have $500 in the account now and should have closer to $1000 after the polo sale.

- With flawless timing Joe "The Reb" Cardinale, the new Old Boys coordinator (a job not unlike that of herding cats), stood up and requested money for an upcoming Old Boys tournament, and removed his shoe and banged on the table shouting "Nyet! Nyet! Nyet!" when he was refused. He then made some slighting comments to the club. No doubt about it, he's off to a commendable start. Anyway, if you're at least 40 and want to play in the tournament on 31 May, contact him ASAP at "bitmonger@earthlink.net." Late breaking news: Boo Daddy has declared an intention to play.

- Boo Daddy Sevens. Boy, are we late in taking this up. Lumberjack and newly-appointed Coordinator Jeff "Badly Needs a Nickname" Gardner will start on the logistics. Target date is July 12th. Probable location is Manassas.

- Somebody mentioned that a Field Captain was required, and by general acclamation Ian Wyatt was so designated. (We figure if we tire him out before the game he'll be less likely to get sin-binned during it.)

- Mark McClatchey started a mention of a sponsorship possibility that led to a sudden and loud designation of him as Sponsorship Chairman. That'll learn him. Speaking of sponsorship, I'll be hitting Guinness up again this summer. (I didn't even know what a Guinness was when I first joined this club.)

- I mentioned that we have invitations to visit two far-off places to play rugby: Christchurch, New Zealand with Johnno's Keith and Niigata, Japan with Aki's Ruggerbeers. The travel expenses are daunting. Then Jeff "I defy you to give me a nickname" Gardner mentioned Brazil. I thought I heard my hammock calling me, then snapped out of it upon the announcement by Jimmy Dum-Dum that he'll be leaving in the Summer to live in San Diego for a few years. This was followed by enthusiastic applause.

We concluded at 8:12. I passed out some photos, Reds polo shirts and black and white jerseys. I will be unloading the polo shirts onto Greg "Jesus" Mull as fast as I can so you can pester him, not me. His address is "rugbyjesus@hotmail.com."

Your rather grumpy servant,

Brigham.