WSRFC Annual
Meeting
Firehouse Grill “Fairfax Reds” Room
14
December 2006
The meeting got
underway at about 7:15 PM or so, by the end of it there were about 34 members
present. Not a bad turnout. I didn’t note any new guys or investigators. One
spy was present from Warrenton RFC, Cruz Hoffman. As he’s a vet and a gentleman
and an officer by Act of Congress and all, we allowed him to stay.
A new Firehouse
Grill restriction was in effect: no smoking. This seriously bummed out the guys
who brought big, stinky cigars. As the meeting progressed I saw Kelly Watkins
take his out from time to time and regard it wistfully. Bummer. However, upon
my arrival home my wife did not put fingers to nose, so that was a nice change.
While I have never expected adulation from females, like most men I appreciate
a smile and a warm greeting.
Steve Lough, the
club president, welcomed us with a toast to the current PRU Division Three
Champs - which got a loud and hearty endorsement.
The first order of
business was a financial review, which, as usual, was somewhat grim. In order
to make it through the season we will require fund-raiser activities and
donations, period. Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their
club. A sponsorship
packet can be found on the website’s “etc.” section. Print it up and go see
your boss. Get on your knees, cur, and beg. Whatever it takes.
Steve Lough
mentioned that we once again have a club post office box, but I didn’t get it
from him, so I guess I have an action item.
The first yelled
“Shut up!” was hurled towards Lew Bunch as he engaged in a rather loud sidebar
conversation. Many more yelled comments would be heard as the evening
progressed, as it was a rather long and tedious meeting (as most of our
business meetings seem to be).
An extended
conversation about dues and CIPP payment ensued, and was pursued with great
vigor. Bottom line, established by a vote: the dues for Spring 2007 are set
at $120, payable in full by 1 March. If we do not receive your dues in full by
then, you may not play. As usual, those new to rugby will pay a
greatly lesser amount, to be set before the season begins. In this way we
provide an incentive for otherwise rational men to engage in what looks like
aggravated assault on a grassy pitch and call it recreational.
A brief discussion
arose about fashion on the pitch: are mismatched socks and shorts retarded, or
do they display character? We did not decide on this weighty matter.
The Spring
Schedule was presented. Here it is, in all its tentative glory:
3 March: Open
10 March: Rocky
Gorge RFC, away game
16, 17, 18 March:
Savannah St. Pat’s Tournament, far away
23 March: (Friday)
GMU B-side match, away
24 March: Pax
River A-Side, home game
31 March: Severn
River RFC, away
14 April: Old
Gaelic Playoffs, home
21 April: MARFU
28 April: Porter
Cup, Richmond, away
It wasn’t noted,
but I assume the Alumni Match is in early May – Kermit, please confirm or deny
At about this
point, Lew was thinking of introducing the somewhat contentious Division
Two/Division Three topic to really disrupt things, but he thought better of it
and declined. Meanwhile, Kevin Corry spoke about hardware.
Sean Mackintosh
was sustained as the Socials Coordinator. The main requirement for this position is the love of drink
and company. So, Sean, put together a recruitment social in January and another
in February, okay? By the way, I asked and learned that, no, he does not play
rugby with a chaw in his mouth. It
just looks that way because he runs with his tongue tucked over his bottom row
of teeth.
Kevin Corry was
loudly acclaimed to be the Fields Coordinator. Preparing our fields for play is a thankless grunt job, but
Kevin serves the club by doing it. He needs help. Here’s your chance to
contribute.
We’re voting on
superlatives by electronic means. Here’s how. Cut and paste the following categories
into an e-mail, fill out your choices, and send this to the club secretary
Elvis at rugblvis@prodigy.net. Let’s
set the deadline for 15 January for now, depending upon the date of the banquet
and sufficient lead time to get plaques made.
Best Forward
Best Back
Most Improved
Player
Best New Player
The Coaches’ Award
is decided upon by the coaches. That’s why it’s called that. (Duh.)
Speaking of the
banquet, Ryan Findley was acclaimed to be the Banquet Coordinator. Stay tuned
for details. It could be in January like it was last year or maybe February.
And I won’t be wearing my El Santo Mexican wrestler mask this time. It unnerved
the bus boys and wives, and I felt weird. You have to do those kinds of things
with some liquor in you, I think.
I took an action
item to provide a bylaws link to this report, so here it is. If you want to know
what it is each officer is supposed to be responsible for, you can read that
here.
Time to vote for
officers! This was a major pain in the rump but we got through it. Here are
your club officers for 2007:
President:
Steve “Big Money” Lough
Vice-President:
Bryan “Guinness-Powered” Siltanen
Treasurer: Jeff
“Bushy” Bush
Match
Secretary: Chris “Kermit” Cahill
We voted to
sustain Jim Borell as the club’s head coach. As he seems to have a knack for producing championship
sides, this was the major no-brainer of the evening. Jim has stated that he’ll
stay on through the playoff season, but as for after that, well… we don’t know
yet.
It was proposed
that we vote on selectors, but another motion to table that until the start of
the season was carried. So you’ll just have to wait.
Three loud cheers
were given for the departed Benoit Cayer. He’s not dead – he merely took
up residence with Porter Wagoner in the Volunteer State of Tennessee. During
this meeting I established that he is French-Canadian; his mother is a Demerse,
as was my mother’s mother. As I have discovered that most French-Canadians are
distantly related, my guess is that he and I are probably something like 5th
cousins. It’s clear who got the looks in the family.
Steve Lough
mentioned the possibility of a USO service opportunity at a Texas Hold’em
Tournament at the Walter Reed Army Hospital; details forthcoming.
The meeting then
closed. Sighs of relief could be heard from the members who hadn’t totally
tuned out.
I must state that of
all the interesting things I saw and heard, the most interesting thing by far
took place in the men’s room – but perhaps I should explain. The men’s room
light is fluorescent, but the ballast is faulty. Consequently it flickers at
what looks like a subtle 40-50 Hertz rate. Something like a fast strobe light.
The effect is noticeable if you went in there and moved your hands quickly and
observed your fingers – it looked weird. But weirder than that was urinating in
this light. As the stream slowed down to droplets, I noticed that the light
appeared to make it appear as if the droplets were held in place in mid-air.
Fascinating… it made me wish I had consumed a few more Cokes.
But here’s the
kicker: I discussed this briefly with Drew Campbell, who also noticed the
effect. While he was describing what he saw, he admitted he urinated with his
back to the door. As the distance from the door to the toilet was about four
feet, I must assume that he was able to produce a really impressive arc with
what must be bladder muscles of iron. (Either that or he totally wet the
floor.)
Really, now, I ask
you: with such men playing for the club, it is any wonder that we’re the PRU
Division Three Champs?
Respectfully
submitted,
Wes “Brigham”
Clark
Webmaster,
rugbyfootball.com
